Monday, May 23, 2011

When it rains it pours...

So I love my boyfriend (The Smooch), he is a truly amazing person.  But like all amazing boyfriends, he sometimes drives me crazy.  I am not saying that I am perfect and I never drive him crazy.  Far from the truth.  But until he gets his own blog, I guess you will just have to read about his crazy.  The thing that drives me the craziest is his absentmindedness and ability to forget everything.  One of the most recent events started with him buying a new car.  He traded his old car in for a shiny new one.  What did he leave in his old car when he traded it in?  The garage door opener to the garage at my house.  For reasons I fail to remember, I gave him my garage door opener.  That was more than two weeks ago.  Fast forward to today.  As anyone living in Ohio realizes, it has been raining a lot.  So today, I get home from a very long day and it is pouring and they are predicting big storms throughout the night.  A good night to park in the garage.  But oh wait, I have no garage door opener.  TheSmooch is at his home, snug and sound and warm and dry with two garage door openers and I am at my house with no garage door openers.  So I did the only logical thing.  I parked in front of my house.  Ran through the front yard, through the back gate, through the back yard and into the garage.  I pushed the garage button and then rain back through the back yard, through the back gate, through the front yard and back to my car.  Then I drove down my street, down the alley, down the back alley into my garage.  Then I ran through the back yard and back into my house.  All in the pouring rain and while wearing heels.  Did I say I love The Smooch.  What I meant to say is I temporarily dislike him and will begin liking him again when I dry off.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

My adventures in the minor dental procedure also known as Skin Grafting

A recent visit to my periodontist left me knowing that I had a receding gum line and would need a skin graft to repair the issue.  Basically, they wanted to remove a small section of skin from the roof of my mouth and relocate it to the receding gum line.  Awesome!  So the day before yesterday was the day.  I was very nervous.  I haven't had much dental work done.  I have only had one cavity but the whole procedure was a breeze and sadly the easiest part of the whole adventure.  My every so loving boyfriend insisted on driving me to the procedure and taking care of me the whole time.  I am sure he regrets making such and offer.  Right after the procedure I gave him a one time offer of punching me in the face in the numb spot.  He declined but I am sure he regrets declining that as well.

The first problem occurred with the first dose of painkillers.  My BF (The Smooch) insisted that I take two.  Hit the pain hard, hit the pain early apparently is his philosophy.  So I took two percocets and an antibiotic and settled in for the night on the couch with some really bad tivo-ed shows.  Not long after the percocet hit me and hit me hard. 

I was high as a kite and feeling no pain. Not sure if my boyfriend gave me a double does of pain killers to kill my pain or to kill the pain in his ass which happens to have the same name as I do.  I was very sleepy and more nauseous than I have ever been in my whole life.  This lead to a long night of The Smooch taking care of me.  He brought me soup, crackers, smoothies, apple sauce, tums and he was great the whole time even though I am sure he was regretting his decision to nurse me back to health.

The next day, I felt great.  No pain and no pain killers needed.  But the first hiccup happened at lunch.  I supposed to be on a soft/ liquid diet. I bought all these yummy soups to eat. I get one out for lunch and it is the old fashioned kind with no pop top. (Or as a friend later told me, not the old fashioned kind, just the normal kind with no pop top.)  I had no can opener. I searched my desk.  No good.  I went next door to see if they neighboring tenant had one.  All they had was a cork screw.  I told them I might be back to get it if I couldn't find anything else.  Finally I just sent my coworker on a wild goose chase to find me a can opener and fast! You know how I get when I have no food in my tummy!  Grouchy!!  My fabulous coworker was kind enough to pick one up for me on her way back from lunch.  The day was saved!  And so was my lunch.

Monday, May 16, 2011

Wild Words from Wild Women

I love quotes.  I think this is because I sometimes have trouble finding ways to express what I am thinking and quotes can sometimes some up the way I am feeling about something.  Or maybe it is because I am not sure how to express myself and a good quote can express that for me.  Or it could just be that I am too lazy to come up with anything original.  Either way I have a daily calendar of quotes.  The calendar is called "Wild Words from Wild Women."  I get a different quote each day.   I was out last week on vacation so I had a whole bunch to read when I got back to work today.  Below are my favorites from last week.  I guess because last week was Mother's Day, most of the quotes had to do with mothers.

"Why don't you learn from my mistakes"  It takes half your life to learn from your own."
~Shelagh Delaney, who turned out A Taste of Honey before she was twenty

"I can't decide if I want a baby.  And my friends who have kids don't make very good salesmen.  They're like, 'Oh, you learn all this great stuff, like how to survive on two hours' sleep.' If I want to learn that, I'll just become a political prisoner or something."
~Cathryn Michon, gag girl

"The story of a mother's life: trapped between a scream and a hug."
~Cathy Guisewite, funny page phenomenon

"Studies show that rectal thermometers are still best way to take a baby's temperature.  Plus, it really shows them who's boss."
~Tina Fey, Emmy Collector

"My mother always told me I wouldn't amount to anything because I procrastinate.  I said, 'Just wait.'"
~Judy Tenuta, tough act to follow

Try to keep your mind open to possibilities and your mouth closed on matters that you don't know about. Limit your 'always' and your 'nevers.' Continue to share your heart with people even if it has been broken. Don't treat your heart like an action figure wrapped in plastic and never used.
~Amy Poehler

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Let the rambling begin.

So I am new to blogging but in the grand tradition that is me, I have decided to try something new.  So let the random rambling/ blogging begin.  After the death of my grandmother a few years back, we found many, many, many journals of her life.  She had journals documenting the birth of all of her children.  She had journals for each of the kids lives and for each of the stages of their lives.  There were journals documenting all the other members of the families and the web their lives had weaved.  Reading through those journals was amazing.  I learned that my mom was the only one of the children born in a hospital.  I learned what my grandmother thought were the differences between hospital births and home births.  I learned that my aunt, gone before my birth, was not the perfect person that I had always thought but she had a boat rocking past.  I learned more about my grandmother after her death than before.  I wish I had known more about her story before she was gone.  Instead she was always my boring, old grandmother.  How wrong I was.  So continuing in her tradition while adding a twist, I am going to start this blog of my life.  A way for me to remember my past, share my stories with others, and leave a written history for my children, their children and their children's children to look back and and think, wow, maybe that old lady I am related to wasn't so boring.  Please join me on my journey.  Feel free to leave comments, questions and suggestions.  There is nothing more than I love than a little feed back.  So feel free to join the conversation.