Sunday, September 29, 2013

My Dream of Chocolate .... A Children's Story

A gal that I went to high school with, Mindy McGinnis recently published a young adult book called Not A Drop To Drink.  This got me thinking, maybe I should write a book, a children's book.  I mean I totally have all the skills.  I've been writing a blog for about 20 minutes.  I don't have kids or want kids but I do see them on television and one time one talked to me at the park.  It was crying and lost or something but I just sent it away.  Wow that was close.  So like I said, totally qualified to write a children's book.  So below, for your eyes only, is my first children's book.  Enjoy!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My Dream of Chocolate

I must be dreaming because I am in a room full of chocolate.  Chocolate as far as the eye can see.  There are all types of chocolate.  Dark chocolates, white chocolates, those delicious Mexican chocolates.  And it was all for me. 

I put the first delicious pieces of chocolate in my mouth.  Amazing.  Oh the sweet goodness.  I couldn't stop.  I was addicted.  I started stuffing as many chocolates into my mouth as I could.  Chocolate sauce spilled everywhere.  It was on my face and in my hair.  But I didn't care because I was so happy.

Then my mom walked in.  "What are you doing?" she shrieked.  "Get away from those chocolates.  What will people think about you putting all those chocolates in your mouth.  You should be more selective and pick only one chocolate.  And one day, when your are my age, you will realize that your delicious chocolates have turned old, white, and crusty."

And then I woke up....  Craving chocolate and wanting more.  Desperate for more, I thought to myself, maybe I can buy chocolate.  Where's my piggy bank?  I was on a mission...

THE END

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So that is my children's story.  After rereading it I thought to myself, wow.  Wow, that is awful.  What can I do to make that crap better.  And then it hit me, like a ton of delicious chocolate.  I needed a gimmick.  I don't need to make this story more appealing to children, they are stupid and have no money.  I need to make this story more appealing to their parents.  How do I do that?  I know.  Pick one word and have the parents' replace that word in their head when they are reading this crappy story.  I am a genius!!!  So reread the story above but replace the word chocolate with sexy men or sexy women depending on your sexual orientation.  I know.  Genius.  And, you're welcome.